c'est la vie

from sunrise to sunset - city hall

Like the interactive art of Nuit Blanche that connected  neighbourhoods across Toronto, my stories from last night required a full range of movement. Over coffee and poached eggs, my parents learned about "this guy that was on the tallest unicycle ever! I don't even know how he got up there, let alone juggle three blazing torches" and the refurbished office building with "a wading pool spanning (hmm I'd say) the entire length of the lobby. There were logs floating freely, I tried to walk on one - quickly thought better of it when I nearly dunked. I would have been pissed if I got wet, it was freaking freezing out. Oh yeah, they also provided us with umbrellas!" In between stories and bites of breakie, I came to realization that the work of art that resonated with me the most was the splash of colour that wiped across the downtown core. Every age and every colour was represented at Nuit. Last night was about Toronto and celebrating contemporary artists and embracing how we are different. United by our shared passion for beautiful and interesting things, our minds were left bursting with wonder, our bodies warmed by the spirit of Toronto.

checks and balances

For me, feeling settled involves a routine (and it has taken a month for me to establish one that suits me in Toronto). Between juggling my post grad studies, a part time job and reconnecting with friends and family...catching enough shut eye is the least of my concerns. I'm sure like most of you, my mind rarely turns off. Many a night, I find myself hunkering through my mental to do list. Unfortunately my bedside goodie drawer holds a stack of post its and a pen to capture my midnight brainwaves...

I was surprised to learn, that compared to my classmates I've only been out of the academic world for a short while. Many have spent extensive time in the developing world working in their personal areas of interest. Impressed by their first hand experiences, I can't help but feel a little behind the eight ball. Nonetheless, our Profs have assured us that regardless of our backgrounds, over the course of the year, we will obtain the necessary skills to write: persuasive grant proposals, create realistic budgets and gain the practical knowledge to run our own field project. I can't help but gawk at these promises, alas, statistics from last years graduates are proof! It is a very real possibility that I will be writing to you from Brazil next fall.

Its clear that currently I am in a state of flux: trying to live in the present, plan for the future and remember the fabulous memories that encapsulate my past. Because, I've written several times about how much I value relationships, you can probably also assume that I find compartmentalizing the bonds I forged in Busan, challenging. These people fed my soul for a year and nurturing my old roots in Toronto without them feels unnatural now. What I have had to realize is, that like all things in life, you get back what you put in. Therefore, all I can do is love them from afar and welcome them back into my physical present when our paths cross again. 

Between listening to your gut, your heart and your head - a girl is bound to get confused! What you have to remember is, that even if you do, some of the best lessons are learned when you are piecing yourself back together after a 'fml' moment. So lift your head out of your hands, open your glassy eyes and take a look at the other nutters around you, you're not alone.

together, but different

keeping the faith

chin up, forge on

I have been a self proclaimed nomad for the last five years and now with my latest adventure complete, it is starting to hit me, that this is it. Among other things, it has been quite a challenge to move back in with my folks. Despite their flexibility, sharing living space always requires an adjustment. To remedy this, I have packed my schedule with school and a part time job, commitments that will integrate me into a new community in Toronto.

Beyond that, I can't quite sum up my feelings in one word. I know I miss Busan for the memories, people and freedom that it holds and I know that I am excited/intimidated by the uncertainty that awaits me in Toronto. At the end of the day, I suppose you just have to have faith and know, that everything happens for a reason. 

here I go again on my own

No, I don't no where I'm going
But I know where I've been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
And I've made up my mind
I ain't waisting no more time.

Bonne chance mon petite frere.

empire state of mind

New York City was my first love.

2dbls

With skyscrapers so tall it is no wonder that it is affectionally referred to as the city of dreams. Dad booked us into the Paramount Times Square, a hotel strategically located within walking distances of all the Big Apple's hot spots.

For five days we explored the depths of the concrete jungle. The quirky boutiques that decorate the sidewalks of SoHo, cafes that literally draw you in off the streets of Greenwich Village and politely declined the promises made by the pedlars that line Canal Street. However, I would have to say that the trip highlights include our visits to the Top of the Rock, The Empire State Building and more simply, a family dinner with my Korean co-teacher, Hyunhee.

30ROCK
Central Park in the distance

30 Rockefellar Plaza and The Empire State Building are famous for their birds eye view of the city. Up there, you realize what a small island Manhattan is. Unencumbered by its finite size, Manhattan is a hub of culture, education, commerce and new growth. Looking out from these towers, I couldn't help but feel like I was at the eentre of the world.

Hyunhee, Xi and I

Alfredo's was the perfect back drop for dinner with Hyunhee. Flanked with absolutely phenomenal homemade Italian food and wine, my parents and Andrew finally met the woman that was my life line in Busan. Our families shared and instant, natural chemistry, illuminating to each respective party why the other is such an important part of my life. At the corner of 49th and Broadway I choked back tears and said goodbye. My relationship with Hyunhee is so unique. At first she was my superior, turned advisor and now, a dear friend.

Like all great loves, you never quite get over it. Watching the island fade in the distance as we climbed higher and higher into the sky, I smiled to myself and wondered - will Manhattan and I ever live happily ever after?  That story is for another day.

up, up and away

Killing time at Incheon International Airport, parked on a stiff wooden bench. I sit back and watch travellers criss cross in front of me, looking important, looking flustered, looking excited. Where is everyone going?

Behind me the clouds are clearing and the sun begins to peak through, my nerves instantly relax. I wonder if I can rationalize another Longchamp. Is three too many?

I let out a little laugh at my own expense, after all my careful planning, I managed to set my alarm for 4:00pm instead of 4:00am - thank goodness for Dad's and international wake up calls.

What was only hours ago seems like days. My eyes begin to sting as I recall my final moments with Busan. Seat 21D, starring out the window at this little man waving feverishly as the plane jerks towards the runway. We lock eyes (or at least I like to think so) and I wave back. He throws up a peace sign and we are off.

and so it goes

full circle together 2010-2011

To the EPIK Class of August 2010, here we are, 365 days later...the pictures to remind us, the battle wounds to prove it and the inside jokes to keep us smiling. Thank-you for joining us at Eva's last night to watch the video that brings these memories to life. Although entirely cliche, lets raise a glass and 'cheers to the nights you'll never remember, with the friends you'll never forget!'

reclaiming youth

Hyunhee, June and I, my co's be like ooah

I've been asked countless times over the last few weeks 'what will you miss the most?' 'what will you do/eat/buy first in Toronto?' so I decided to dedicate a post to answer these questions. 

kym + alex + jen + matt = family

womanlove, onelove

Leaving Korea, I am sorry to say goodbye to: subway fobs, #504, humpday hangouts, uh uh, my celebrity status, no tax, cheap taxis, Family Mart and underground cell service. Heading home I cannot wait to: taste barbecued corn on the cob, satisfy my sweet tooth (hello Smartfood, Fudgee-Os and sour patch kids), be invited to try clothes on, eavesdrop on conversations in public and relax dockside (Corona in tow) up north. 

Haeundae Beach

My dear Busan family, I don't know what I expected but I didn't expect you, jackpot. Toronto, you hold my roots, can't wait to sprout some new ones with ya... I'm coming home.

I won't forget.